Keep What Is Valuable To You Because You May Never See It Again

Journaling is so important to me, as I do it all the time.  My own private journals.  I kept a journal when I was living with my mom, right after her diagnosis with Alzheimer's disease, when the Dr. said she can no longer live alone.  Another sister wrote in the journal sometimes, too.  But I did most of the writing.  I wrote about the good and the bad days, I quoted things mom said, I wrote of what she said during our prayers, and I wrote about my feelings and the struggles we both went through.  When I moved I placed the journal in another sister's hands, the one I turned over POA to.  I thought I did the right thing, to let the others continue to write in it.  But things changed.  The POA got stolen from the sister I gave it to, by another sister who wanted to control everything, and mom got taken away from her home.  Now I find out after months of asking about the journal, that the journal got 'lost in the shuffle'.  What is that supposed to mean?  It either means she didn't care enough to put it in a safe place and it got thrown out, or she gave it to the controlling sister because she was demanding everything be given to her.  In either case, it's gone.  A piece of my life with mom is gone.  It's more than paper with words.  I regret trying to do what I thought was right in thinking of my sisters.  I should have thought of myself and kept the journal.  I can rewrite some of what I remember but it won't be accurate.  I don't have dates, quotes, details.  My journaling now is very accurate and it will continue, without anyone taking it away from me.  I learned a very important lesson...don't give someone something that is very important to you if there is even a remote possibility you will never see it again, because what you value, someone else couldn't care less about.

This is Good Advice

Some Things Never Change

Sometimes, you just need to walk...and not look back.
Change means that what was before wasn't perfect. It means what's old got boring.

Choose To Live Your Life With Happiness and Don't Regret Your Decisions

There's so many things about life that I don't understand, and I will never have the answers to everything I want to know.  None of us will.  That is part of the challenges we face in life, trying to figure out the answers to all those questions we have.  At least if we can accept that we don't need to have all the answers, we can live our lives with a higher level of happiness. 

“It is better to live your own destiny imperfectly than to live an imitation of somebody else's life with perfection.” ― Anonymous, The Bhagavad Gita

We've all heard that expression...Life is short.  Sadly for some, life is shorter than it is for others.  So why not live the best life we can while we are still here?  Why not choose to be happy?  I know it's hard sometimes, but try to make choices that bring you happiness.  We all want to live the best life we can, to be happy and do what is right for us, and for those we love.  Do you ever hear anyone say otherwise?   Nobody wants to cause misery to another person.   At least, no decent person does.  And nobody wants to live an unhappy life.  Go for what you want that makes you happy!

“There will be a few times in your life when all your instincts will tell you to do something, something that defies logic, upsets your plans, and may seem crazy to others. When that happens, you do it. Listen to your instincts and ignore everything else. Ignore logic, ignore the odds, ignore the complications, and just go for it.”
― Judith McNaught, Remember When

I know people make decisions that adversely affect their lives, both consciously and unconsiously.  We all make mistakes because we are not perfect.  We can look back on our lives and see where we went wrong, and where we may have been able to change the course of our lives, had we made different decisions.  But that is life...we choose, we grow, we fail, we achieve, we loose, we regret, we learn.  We are constantly faced with decisions, and we don't know the outcome of those decisions until after the fact, sometimes minutes, sometimes days, weeks, months, or even years later.  We live and learn, and we will never stop learning and growing as long as we are living. 

“That’s the thing about a human life-there’s no control group, no way to ever know how any of us would have turned out if any variables had been changed.”
― Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray, Love: One Woman's Search for Everything Across Italy, India and Indonesia

The important thing is to accept that we are going to make mistakes.  We are not always going to make the best decisions on everything we ever encounter in our lives.  Sometimes we have to look back to realize if our choices were wrong or right.  Sometimes our decisions are not as simple as right or wrong, they are simply a choice.  It's no different for anyone, no matter who you are.

“As long as the world is turning and spinning, we're gonna be dizzy and we're gonna make mistakes.”
― Mel Brooks

In light of that, articles like this can help us to at least think a little harder about what it is that is most important in life, before it is too late.  http://www.inspirationandchai.com/Regrets-of-the-Dying.html
I think I've made a conscious effort to do that, but I guess I won't really know until it is the end of the road for me.

Starting a New Tradition For the Holidays, and Trip to Jerome, Haynes, and Sedona, AZ

This year was a new beginning to a Thanksgiving tradition, since our former holiday traditions have become a thing of the past. With my grandparents and my dad long gone, my mom in a nursing home, and the distance of my sisters, holidays are not the same as they once were.  That's the thing about life, things change, traditions change, and we start new ones. It's not supposed to be a sad thing, but a happy, new beginning. The past holidays of Thanksgiving and Christmas will forever be etched in my memory, but now, going forward, I am starting a new tradition. We have decided that every other year we will get together at my house for either Christmas or Thanksgiving. Since this was the year for Thanksgiving, we celebrated Christmas too. My kids will be with their significant other's families for Christmas this year. Next year our family will be together for Christmas instead of Thanksgiving. I think we got it all worked out where everyone knows the schedule and can plan accordingly. 

There's so much going on right now and my mind is usually in a state of worry about my mom's health.  So it was so nice having all of my kids come here for the holiday and we could spend some good quality time together.  It offered me a nice distraction, and we had a really fun time. They always make me laugh!  I love being with all of them.  I didn't get to be with my mom, but I plan to see her just as soon as I can get back to Chicago.

My son and his family flew in from San Francisco and my youngest daughter and her boyfriend flew in from Chicago.  My oldest daughter lives here in Phoenix, near me. My house isn't that big so we had to divide the family between my house and my daughter's house for sleeping arrangements. It's ok though, because we spent most of our waking hours together.  I had all of my kids and grandkids here, and I went to bed at night, peacefully, knowing they were all safe and sound. All moms know that feeling!  Even though my kids are grown, we moms still worry about them.

I usually have my Christmas tree up early so it wasn't that big of a deal putting it up when I did.  It did feel kind of strange getting all of my Christmas shopping done so early.  I was listening to Christmas music and wrapping presents when other people were just starting their Christmas lists. I don't know what it's going to feel like when Christmas is actually here, because right now I feel like it's over, except when I go to the stores and am reminded that Christmas is still coming.  It's everywhere.  I love this time of year.

When my youngest daughter and her boyfriend arrived last Wednesday, we headed out for a mountain hike shortly after returning from the airport.  By the time we got to the mountain, we stopped for a jump shot picture, which is something my daughter and I always do.  She can jump higher than I can, but I say it's because she's so much younger, AND, she is more athletic than me with all those years of dance, cheerleading, and other sports.   Anyway, it's a fun thing for us to do.

Here's my daughter and her boyfriend...

After our pictures, we set out on the mountain trail.  The rocks were really loose and I warned everyone to be careful.  So what do I do?  I guess I wasn't careful enough, because I ended up slipping on the rocks and I fell and landed on a hard rock that jabbed me in the upper part of my leg.  Thankfully, I didn't get hurt badly and was able to walk ok.  Shortly after that we turned around and headed back to the house.  Soon after, a bruise appeared, and my leg was sore.  But about 5 days later, after all the kids left, that's when it started to bother me.  I got some Arnicare from the drugstore and I applied heat to the bruise (which was the worst bruise I have ever seen).  Both of those things helped because it felt so much better and looked so much better within just two days.  Anyway, enough of that.

Later that day I picked up my son, daughter-in-law, and grandson from the airport.  I just saw them earlier in the month, but of course it was so sweet to see them again.  I fixed lasagne and baked spaghetti and french bread for supper that night, and all the kids and their spouses and my grandkids were at my house.  The grandkids played really well together.  They are 3, almost 2, and just turned 2 years old.

This was taken at my daughter's house...

We had Thanksgiving dinner at my daughter's house the next morning.  She has a bigger dining room table than me so we agreed to have it there this year, and we both shared the preparation of the food.  I baked the turkey at my house, so I got the most important job!  I think it turned out really good.

Here's a picture of my kids on Thanksgiving.

The day after Thanksgiving we packed the family in two cars and drove to Jerome, Arizona, which is an historical ghost town.  It is considered the most vertical city in America.  The views from the vistas were beautiful.  You could see Sedona and the San Francisco Peaks in Flagstaff from the town.
This is Jerome...

 

We left Jerome and drove a short distance to the town of Haynes, Arizona, which is an old mining town, and a completely deserted ghost town.  A mine was constructed to mine for copper but gold was found instead.  It was interesting walking through the town and going inside the old buildings, and seeing all the old cars and trucks and equipment.

After walking around Haynes, we drove about 20 miles to Sedona. I've been there before but my younger two have not been there.  It is such a beautiful place and it would be such a neat place to live.  Not only the beauty, but the energy some people feel from the vortexes is what draws spectators to the area. This first picture is the Chapel of the Holy Cross, which was built in 1956...the same year that I was born.

 A couple of pictures of me and my kids. 

 Here's a picture of our whole gang.

 The beautiful Sedona sunset. 

When we got home after our trip we went to my daughter's house and ate some left-over food.

The next day we prepared a big breakfast at my house.  My daughter and her husband made pumpkin, walnut pancakes and my daughter-in-law made an egg and hashbrown casserole.  I made some bacon and cinnamon rolls and we had some fresh fruit and juice.  After breakfast we turned on some Christmas music and opened our presents.  I just loved the kids' expressions and obvious signs of happiness and excitement when they opened their gifts.  That is what makes Christmas so special.  Seeing that. 

Here's my grandkids again.  My daughter curled the girls' hair for a photo shoot later on...

 I love this picture of them...

Here's the rest of the family...

 After our Christmas, the kids took naps and then we went to Scorpion Gulch at South Mountain for a photo shoot.  My daughter is an aspiring photographer and she wanted to take pictures of the family.  We really appreciated it, and she got some awesome shots.  Here's some of them...

I took this one.

 Later that night we hung out at the house and ordered pizza.  My son and my daughter's boyfriend put some cool apps on my iphone and showed me some of the features of my new phone that I didn't  know about.  My daughter's boyfriend made a Lady Gaga CD for me (I love her songs) and next time I go to Chicago he is going to download her songs to my ipod.  We talked about a family vacation next year, and decided a Disney cruise next fall/winter would be a great thing for the young ones and the adults.  We've got some planning to do!  That will be a blast, and more than anything, it will be a great memory for all of us.