Have You Ever Been Touched By a Homeless Person?

I went to Walmart the other day, looking for toys for my grandchildren for Christmas.  I walked out of the store empty-handed.  I couldn’t find what I was looking for, and I was upset with myself for wasting my time going there.  I don't like this particular Walmart (even though I love Walmart stores in general), and I normally avoid it at all costs.  When I left the store, my daughter called out to me from the parking lot.  She had just gotten there to pick up a few things after work.  I was surprised to see her there and I walked over to her car where we talked for a few minutes.  Then I went back to my car and drove off. 

As I was leaving the parking lot I noticed a homeless woman walking along the edge of the lot, pushing a grocery cart filled about half way up with her belongings.  She was dirty. and everything in her cart was dirty.  She had on pants and a coat and a hood over her head, even though the temperature was in the 70’s.  I could see her eyes and they looked so sad. I don’t believe she made eye contact with me.  It was as if she was in her own little world, a desolate world, where nobody paid any attention to her, or her to them. 

My heart went out to this woman.  There was something about her that touched me.  My heart sank, and I knew I had to do something.  I couldn't just drive off and ignore her.  She looked like she was around my mom’s age.  But I could've been totally wrong.  She may have only been my age, but her hard life aged her.  I watched her walk in my rear view mirror and she walked so wobbly and weak.  Her knees were turning inward.  I turned my car around and drove up a little bit and parked so I could observe her, wanting so bad to help her.  She reached down and picked up something and then picked up something else.  I don’t know if it was a can or what it was.  Then she sat down on the curb and put her head in her lap.  That did it for me.  Seeing her do that brought tears to my eyes...it just broke my heart. 

I reached into my purse and pulled out three dollars, and I slowly drove up to her, thinking about what I was going to say.  I rolled the passenger window down and I called out to her and said, “Ma am, do you need any help?”  She stood up and approached my car and I could see her face well, with dirt between the wrinkles of her weathered skin.  I once again saw those sad looking eyes.  She said, “Where are we going?”  It looked like she was going to open my car door.  I said, "We aren’t going anywhere, I was just wondering if you needed anything.”  She said, “Do you know where the races are?  Are we going to the races?”  I knew she had some mental issues when she went on to say, “Is this a race car?  Are you a race car driver?”  I said no.  I asked her again if she needed any help and she backed away and started to sit on the curb again, almost like she was defeated in that I wasn't going to take her to the races, and then she said, “I could use a dollar.”  I said here, and I held out the 3 dollars, as she stood up and approached my car and reached her right hand in to take the money. 

I could swear it looked like she wanted to touch my hand.  I noticed her old, wrinkled hand was filthy, with dirt between her long fingernails.  I almost thought she was going to grab my hand.  I don’t know why, but I got scared for a split second.  She took the money and slowly sat down again.  I don’t think she thanked me, but I could tell by the look in her eyes that she was very grateful.  I said, “God bless you!” 

As I drove off, I prayed for this woman while choking back tears.  There was something about her.  I realized that there was a reason I went to Walmart after all, and she was the reason why.  I didn't do much at all for this poor woman, but she did something to me.  She has been on my mind ever since.  I see that image of her head in her lap, and her long skinny fingers reaching for the money, I just can't shake it.  After I drove down the street I almost turned back around because I forgot to ask her name.  It didn’t really matter I guess, but I wanted to know her name.  I bet it’s been awhile since anyone has asked her that. 

Today I drove through the Walmart parking lot looking for her. She wasn't there.  I drove through the lot next to it and down another street nearby, and still no homeless woman.  I'm sure she pretty much sticks to that area since she didn't look like she could walk very far.  I talked to my daughter today and she said she saw the woman that day that she saw me.  She said she saw me drive past her, but she didn't know I turned around to approach her.  She said she's seen her several times in that area because her kids go to daycare just down the street.  I told her to text me the next time she sees her.  I will go to her again, and maybe I can do something more for her.  I looked up some agencies and phone numbers for outreach programs for the homeless and I will try to get someone to come talk to her about their services.  I do know from working at a homeless agency in the past that sometimes people who live on the streets don’t want to participate in the services that are available.  They don't want any help.  But maybe this woman will welcome the help. Just maybe she can be saved from the streets and given shelter, food and medical attention.  I hope so, she is a human being and she deserves to be loved and cared for.